Blog Spam Swamp Gas

@gnat SMS Spam? I got it.

Blog spam (swamp gas) is entertaining, so long as you don’t take it seriously. You’ve got to love the literacy of it all.

Here are a few gems with my intended retorts. All those annoying links have been removed and sent to doo-doo land, along with my fantasy replies. I was on a rebound flash-back while reading the spam and just had to say something.

Let’s keep it to just a few. Too much of this stuff gets really boring.

Spam: This is a message to the admin. Your website is missing out on at least 300 visitors per day. I discovered this page via Google but it was difficult to find as you were not on the first page of search results. I have found a website which offers to dramatically increase your traffic to your website:(spam-o-link). I managed to get over 10,000 visitors per month using their services, you could also get lot more targeted traffic than you have now. Hope this helps. Take care.

Reply: So, how come your spam-o-link site isn’t on the first 300 pages that Google showed me? Take care.

Spam: It is common inside developed countries such as the look into the prove that there much like online enough to stop paying it (spam-o-link). Decades earlier, if one acquired a three to percent idea, it was a fantastic tip.

Reply: Urg. Forget “developed countries.” You need an introduction to English if you’re going to try to communicate in English. Decades earlier? Huh? You should be congratulated, though, for achieving your own three percent literacy quotient.

Spam: I was reading this article and find it very informative. I admired the writer’s effort as he beautifully selects the most appropriate words for his post. The choice of his words has made this article unique and interesting. While reading this article I was feeling that I can completely understand the theme of this article and writer has written exclusively for me or for my school of thought.

Reply: Wow! Well, I have to admit that I wrote the post just for you and you only. Sadly, I lost your email address. Now, lose my blog address.

Spam: Greatly lucrative! Therefore… I nevermore search what I ask for. Much far more ideas and much even more nonconformity… a comment, I will actually do this.

Reply: Suchforth happy to please you and will far look to your vanishment.

Spam: This knowledge requires toady up to definition and is intended primarily for use by way of salubrity regard workers and facilities/organizations providing haleness care including pharmacies, hospitals, long-term heed facilities, community-based health regard care providers and pre-hospital pinch services.

Reply: Huh?

Spam: I used to be able to find good advice from your articles.

Reply: Thank the Spam Gods you found someone else.


9 thoughts on “Blog Spam Swamp Gas

  1. These gave me such a giggle, Michael …

    I get a lot of my spam in Chinese these days … plus old Louis Vuitton … for some reason. I do wish he would eff off and try and sell his luggage to someone else.

    Loved your replies and will now effect my own vanishment. x

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