Gregor likes to reinvent himself. His keepers tell him this is the best way to overcome his failed lobotomy.
A while back, Gregor started barfing on blogs. See Gregor Barfs on Your Blog for the details. Since then, Gregor has had a few moments of lucidity. He wants to fill in the details for you.
Gregor has a 5 point scale for blog reading. A blog with 0 points gets passed over. A blog with 5 points gets a comment. It’s also possible to gather bonus points, but it’s rare. This system keeps blog reading simple, and Gregor likes simple.
Here’s how it works:
0 Points. Gregor encounters a bad title and a boring opening sentence. He moves on and takes no notice.
1 Point. The title is a grabber. It’s unique and captures his interest. Unfortunately, the opening sentence or two tumbles down the boring hole. Gregor moves on.
2 Points. Good title, interesting opening lines. Gregor pushes the button and looks for gold. The first paragraph is a fail. Maybe it’s poorly written, maybe it just bores him. Gregor can bore easily when not on his meds. Anyway, Gregor closes the window and goes back to trolling.
3 Points. Gregor gets halfway through the post and his mind begins to wander. Is it Gregor? Is it the writer? Hard to say. Gregor loses interest and looks elsewhere.
4 Points. Gregor gets through the entire post. He is happy. It’s a good read, interesting, fun, whatever. Gregor will come back to this blog from time to time. He hits the LIKE button. Gregor never hits the LIKE button unless he has read the entire post. He wants to be fair to the writer.
5 Points. Gregor is hooked. He hits the LIKE button and adds a comment. Maybe it’s just a short, one-liner. Maybe longer. Gregor wants the writer to know that he or she did a really good job. It’s hard to please Gregor so he chooses carefully.
Bonus Points. Gregor is blown away by the post and goes on to read a few others. LIKE is not enough. A comment is not enough. Gregor hits the FOLLOW button and looks forward to the next post. Gregor celebrates.
Gregor lives here.